OLD HALLOWEEN INCENTIVE ON TWC IS HERE!!!
I ran out of time, so here’s a rerun!
As for this comic…
On the topic of poor people malls…
We all know the poorest of poor people malls: the tiny ones full of downtrodden old people, where every store is a dollar store or shady import store or something like that. There are many creaky, old, poor people malls in my fine city of Hamilton.
But it was only a few years ago that I discovered that all the malls in Hamilton were actually poor people malls – even the ‘classy’ ones. Because I visited a real rich people mall: the West Mall in Toronto, city of shiny wealth. While strolling past Saks Fifth Avenue and other super high-end clothing stores, I stumbled across the food court. It was the most puzzling food court I’d ever seen: no New York Fries, no KFC. Instead there were just boutique fast casual joints selling upscale ‘fusion’ takes on various international cuisines.
The women around me were dressed like runway models. There were no seniors in sight. And it was then that I realized that this mall did not want me in it. I wasn’t welcome. (For the record, I only came for the Lego store.)
I can’t be sure, but I’m pretty sure there are even richer malls in downtown Toronto: ones made of gold, with valet parking and food court vendors with Michelin stars. I’d investigate, but I’m pretty sure their existence is revealed to you only on a need-to-know basis. And I’m not part of the club.
Bi-Way
Man, I do really miss Bi-Way.
Towers, which got bought by Zeller’s. Then Zellers’ mall leases got sold to Target who botched their logistics and pulled out of Canada. Only now is Zeller’s starting to make a come-back as a small section in some Bay locations.
We used to get our family photos at Sears!
I think I still have the mental mapping to navigate where it used to be.
I want the mall where you’ve got a Toys R Us, Pants and Burgers, lots of space, Gingiss Formalwear, a disco pants and haircuts, Davidson’s bakery, Frank’s Drum Shop, baby clothes, Pier 1 Imports, Contemporary Furs & Leathers, Jewel and a J.C. Penny. It must have the new Oldsmobile’s in early. And it must have a jeweler for watch repair.
I do sometimes feel a painful desire to return to the retail landscapes of my youth. To see the malls as they were in my childhood. Alas, it cannot be.
Is it me, or do I make some of the most obscure movie references?
And bring your quarters for the Arcade games!
Toys R Us is still in Canada, last I heard.
It is. That’s one luxury we are still afforded.
Do they have a Miss Piggy to go with a Grover?
And a book store.
There may still be one or two K-Marts still open.
There are three at the time of writing. The Canadian ones were gone in the 90’s, though.
Woolworths closed in the UK more than a decade ago, at least you still have Woolworths in Canada.
We don’t. It’s been dead for decades.
The last Sears Grand was in that Jack Benny place.
At least I can still get my Straw Boaters from that Lou Costello hat company.
Yes. Yes, you do. There’s a mirror.
She does. In fact, she looks more like Walmart shopper.
Talk about being behind the times. At the very least I would have thought that Tracee would have known which stores have closed by now due to them being out of business ?
She doesn’t read the finance news, I guess.
There is irony in that statement considering the current situation and all that…
Indeed.
That is entirely consistent with what we’ve seen of her character up to this point.
I suppose she things Wal-Mart is where they sell walls.
Darn. “Thinks” not “things.”
The best walls. For the cheapest prices.
I thought Sears operated in Canada as Simpsons. At least it did in Montreal when we visited in 1970.
BTW, Miranda is doing a clever job at mimicking Tracee’s facial expression. Or perhaps she is showing off her own contempt…
Sears was just Sears in my neck of the woods. Simpsons existed separately – if I remember correctly, Simpsons was the more upscale version.
And yeah, either Miranda is emulating or unimpressed. Maybe a bit of both.
Sears blew it when they closed their catalog business—five minutes later, Amazon started up.
Let’s see. Sherway Gardens is on the West Mall in Etobicoke. The valet parking is on the north side of that mall.
Yeah, Sherway Gardens is the official name, I guess. I’m not rich enough to use the real name.
I love the side-eye that Miranda is giving Tracee in the last panel – they grow up so fast!
They do. Though actually, they grow up slowly in Miranda’s case. She’s over ten years old in real time.
Still can’t the beat West Edmonton Mall of the 80’s 😉
Gotta love the ones with roller coasters.
Mall of America in Minnesota. Roller coasters, LEGO store, and a Gamestop where I bought some used games I got a lot of mileage out of.
Some say it’s the best.
And submarines.
Woolworths closed in the UK more than a decade ago, at least you still have Woolworths in Canada.
Not really. I remember Woolworths when I was a teenager; they were a discount retail department store. The last ones closed in the early 2000’s. The company re-branded itself as Foot Locker, changing its focus to athletic clothing, which is doing well.
S.S.Kresge’s, anyone?
A classic. I distinctly remember buying a canister of M.U.S.C.L.E. figures at a Kresge’s close-out sale. Good memories.
I also remember a classic of Canadian retail experiments: Consumers Distributing.
<3
The richest mall I’ve been in was in Las Vegas. 10′ ice sculptures in the common areas (in the DESERT). Stores I’ve never heard of, but just OOZE “If you have to ask the price, you can’t afford it.” No food court, per se, just upscale bars and celebrity chef restaurants.
And homeless people just outside begging for money. (Again, in the desert, with 10′ tall ICE SCULPTURES on permanent display just inside the doors.)
I’ve never been to Vegas, but I’ve watched videos of bloggers touring the place. It seems utterly insane.
The Air France terminal at Charles De Gaulle airport in Paris is NOT a “poor people” mall.
Simpson’s
Robinson’s
Eaton’s
All of which were in the same 2-block radius of each other downtown Hamilton. Add in Kresgee’s and Woolworth’s (the lunch counter was a fav), and then pick up something from Denninger’s on the way home.
The glory of downtown Hamilton predated me. By the time I was old enough to remember anything, it was a terrifying land of homelessness and desperation.
At this point the only response Tracee deserves is an invitation to the camping dept. And ask her what tent her self important entitled ass wants to live in. Or grow the f@#$ up.
You drive a hard bargain. But a sensible one.
Venture!
Sears failed for a single reason: No carts.
Who the hey wants to carry any significant amount of merchandise around a huge store, often with multiple floors ?
Not me.
Some stores are ok without carts: a Comic Book Store, a high end Shoe Store (mebe), Victoria Secrets, pretty much anywhere they do not expect you to buy much.
But this very short list never should have included Sears.
I never thought about that. But yeah, that’s a valid point. Carts. That was their downfall.
Sears had a number of problems.
https://www.versobooks.com/blogs/news/4385-failing-to-plan-how-ayn-rand-destroyed-sears
It’s always Ayn Rand who’s to blame. Good article.
Kiiinnnnd’a.
They were having problems before that and you could argue that the executive in question didn’t understand something important. But trying to follow her philosophy instead of just identifying and then fixing the problems definately widened the hole in the bottom of the ship and let the water just flood in. Us Americans are terrible with the idealism, even when they’re awful ideals. :/
I miss the restaurant we used to have at the Zellers we had in our city. Best burgers in the city. Even better than the Teen Burgers at A&W.
That’s saying something!
I’m impressed that she’s still got a tan, but I’m curious if we’ll see Tracee revealing secret sewing skills.
The tan might fade. But I suspect not. More on that later.
I remember Sears & Roebuck! ( AKA Sears & rubbish.) But does Tracee also hate “Ralph Lauren”? She seems super-snobby.
The joke is that Ralph Lauren is already considered a high-end brand. The fact that Tracee would turn up her nose at it is kinda telling.
Only one word can describe Tracee: SNOBiSSIMA! 😉
That IS a word. A nice one.